Dilwale dulhania le jayenge (1995)

दिलवाले दुल्हनिया ले जाएँगे

Occasionally a film comes along that hits a powerful resonance with its audience.  Such a film can be a trendsetter, making superstars of its cast, changing the direction of an industry, and even, to an extent, of a society.  Dilwale dulhania le jayenge ("The brave-hearted one shall carry away the bride") is such a cinematic bellwether, striking a perfect chord at a particular crossroads of Indian society where foreign influence meets domestic traditionalism.  It's a very important film, and it is also a reasonably enjoyable one.

Simran (Kajol) lives in London with her family, but she's been raised to be a seedhi-saadhi Punjabi ladki - a nice upstanding Punjabi girl.   Relatively unaffected by the influence of her western setting, Simran understands her duty to her family - to her strict, serious father (Amrish Puri) particularly - and submits to her engagement to a boy selected for her at her birth, the son of her father's close friend in India.  Before her marriage, though, she begs her father for one month to live life on her own terms, traveling through (continental) Europe on a tour with some of her school friends.  Her impassioned request - combined with a lifetime of never once defying him - softens her father and he reluctantly agrees.  Then she meets Raj (Shah Rukh Khan), another London-dwelling Indian who is brash, impulsive, and immature, but also apparently good-hearted - and love happens.  When her father learns of this upon Simran's return, he whisks her away to India for immediate sealing of the marriage that was planned for her twenty years prior.  Raj follows, and undertakes a systematic plan to win the hearts of Simran's family - even her unyielding father.

Dilwale dulhania le jayenge's message is one of balance between the hip, modern, foreign influence on the one hand, and respect for the traditional foundations of Indian society on the other, and at the time of its release, it inverted a number of prevalent filmi cliches.  At the core of the film is Raj's refusal to run away with Simran, even when she begs him to elope; he is determined to win the approval of her father and will not marry her until he does so, even though failure would mean losing her forever.  Elopement followed by tragic end was a common filmi theme at the time; in Dilwale dulhania le jayenge, Raj rejects the temptation of that course in favor of deference to tradition.   In another twist on convention (as noted by crazyone on the BollyWHAT? forum), the foreign-raised Raj is the good guy, while Simran's homegrown, all-Indian fiance is cruel, promiscuous, and dishonest.  I suspect that these twists lie at the heart of what gives this film purchase to be the industry-changing, enduring success that it has been, especially among Indians living outside of their homeland and therefore necessarily surrounded by the influential forces of foreign culture.    

The film's message is undermined by the tactics chosen by Raj to win the approval of Simran's family.  He engineers a deception to infiltrate the inner circle of the two families preparing for the wedding, and continues ingratiating himself to them with exaggerated kindness to the elder family members, sweetness to the girls, and chumminess with the guys.  It is all a grand ruse and deception, however, and the film begins to fall apart if one thinks too hard about what it means that the guy who supposedly espouses traditional values is lying and cheating right and left in an attempt to demonstrate them.  His act casts doubt on the veracity of the upstanding-Indian-boy persona itself; one cannot be sure that he isn't lying to Simran just as well as he lies to her family. 

When such thoughts can be suppressed, though, the film is charming and engaging; the romance works, and I found myself rooting for the pairing despite the fact that I didn't particularly like either of the principals as individuals.  The film's unquestionable greatest strength is that Raj and Simran do have some staunch allies among their parents; Raj's father (Anupam Kher) and Simran's mother (Farida Jalal) are determinedly on their side and do everything within their limited power to grease the wheels, and this prevents the film from devolving into the timeworn "us vs. them" intergenerational slugfest.  But "limited power" is the key phrase.  In the film's standout scene, Simran's mother delivers a heartbreaking speech in which she declares that while she promised herself she would secure autonomy and happiness for her daughter, the lot of an Indian girl is not within her power to change.  She brought tears to my eyes with the wonderful line main to yeh bhuul gayi thi - ki aurat ko vaada karne ki bhi koi haq nahin hai - "I forgot this: that a woman has no right even to make a promise."

Finally, a word on the music of Dilwale dulhania le jayenge - this is a soundtrack I always want to like more than I do.  It is packed with catchy tunes and hummable melodies, like "Ho gaya hai tujhko to pyar," and the mega-mega-hit "Tujhe dekha to yeh jaana sanam."  But the soundtrack grates despite its strengths, for one overwhelming reason: Lata Mangeshkar was far past her prime.  She's warbly, shrill, and overdubbed, and doesn't always hit her pitch.  I adore Lata ji's beautiful work through the 50s, 60s, and 70s - but Dilwale dulhania le jayenge is Exhibit A for why I think she should have retired after the 1980s.   

(Post script:  As usual, reading Philip Lutgendorf's commentary on his Philip's fil-ums website makes me wonder why I bother; in this case, his astute discussion of Dilwale dulhania le jayenge makes several outstanding and interesting points.)

Comments

[Sanket]

Oh snap - you beat me to the punch. I was going to do a review & post songs on my website next week to commemorate the record setting 600th week of this movie playing at a theater in India. Oh well, I can always link to yours as a 'bonus' :) I completely agree about the movie & songs - I am glad I am not the only one to think Lata was past her prime in this one. You are a legend Lataji but it was time to retire with some grace.

[Daddy's Girl]

I will always have a special place in my heart for this film. It was the movie that got me 'back' into Bollywood, the bridge between my childhood experience of Hindi films and my ongoing grown-up love for them. I saw it (very appropriately) just a few days before my brother's wedding, a wedding that took place far from home and proved to be a watershed event for my family - it was the last time (since then) that we were all together, oblivious to what lay ahead, trusting, dancing the night away and just so happy. So DDLJ is very important to me personally, inextricably bound up with so many emotions and special moments. This film is also important to me for other less earth-shaking reasons - it was the first time I saw SRK and Kajol together and fell for them, both separately and as a couple (I didn't like SRK at all for the first hour or so of the movie, but he grew on me). It was the first time I got to be terrified by Amrish Puri. And I love the music despite its imperfections. Thanks for your thoughtful review (and apologies for the long comment!)

[Sanni]

I figured you wouldn't absolutely love this film like many do. And no harm done, as you already have your 90's classic romance pick-me-up Bollywood film of choice - HAHK. I'm glad you enjoyed it in general, but I have one small bone to pick.

one cannot be sure that he isn't lying to Simran just as well as he lies to her family.
When I read this, it makes me go "hmmmm". If I replace "one" with "Carla", however, I can accept it - it's just one view. I personally didn't see Raj's deception as so terribly deceptive. He's being himself, after all, he's not going his way to hide his true being as he's the same charming guy as he is, though perhaps a bit more G-rated. His motive is to win them over, as he knows there is no go with just walking up to Simran's father and asking for her hand boldly.

His plan isn't flawless - I would even argue it's rather naive and he didn't perhaps think it through up to the last detail. But it's genuine and he's just doing his utmost for her and him to be together.

I suppose there are glitches in any movie - you start to think about something, then analyze it, then discover it doesn't work for you, and then you talk to people who saw the movie and find they didn't even notice it - and DDLJ probably has a ton of these. You're right in that if you overlook such, it works fine. Sometimes you can't overlook them, that's okay too.

I don't really see why you had doubts about him telling Simran the truth, though. He's doing it all for her and for the sake of them being together. He doesn't seem to have any reason to lie to her which is why I don't think he ever did lie.

[Beth]

I'm also not a mega-fan of this movie, but the more movies I watch, the more I think I should revisit some of the classics that I didn't adore - while it's fine that I don't adore them, I'd like to understand my reactions more and think about them further.

I do think Raj is inherently prone to - or at least open to - duplicitousness. It's pretty clear that he has not had the most noble of upbringings; he's not a monster, but he's a bit of a weak-willed gadabout. While I don't doubt that he loves Simran, I also think he might be a bit caught up in his scheme and the potential glory of "winning." Not entirely, and I certainly don't think he is more interested in his scheme than he is in its purpose/inspiration, but I think his youthful male arroagance enters into it a little bit. But I also find that consistent with his character, so it doesn't really bother me. If he were to be completey different person once he hit Indian soil, that would be enough of a volte face to be troubling. And what's Raj going to be like after the train pulls out of the station? Is he going to keep with his India ego? Or is he going to revert back to the London version of himself?

The more I think about this, the less sure I am that I understand who Raj really is. Then again, he's 23 or whatever, so he probably doesn't know either.

Oh, and great point about how awful the "true Indian" boy is. He's one of the classic arses of Indian cinema, in my opinion, the prime example of which is the jerky bully boyfriend in Koi Mil Gaya.

[carla]

Sanket ji: Please do a post on the DDLJ soundtrack; I'd love to hear what you have to say about it. I am always a little afraid of criticizing Lata because some people are very vehement that she still sounds wonderful to this day. I admit that I don't hear it though.

Sanni ji: I had a feeling this post would catch me a Sanni. :) I hope it goes without saying that I'm only expressing my own views here; and I think we both knew ahead of time that DDLJ is not the kind of film that would curl my toes - I'm not a romance type of person generally, I think. And I did like the film, perhaps even more than I thought I would. Having said that, I just don't agree with you that Raj had no motivation to lie. The conquest itself was motivation enough. And when Amrish Puri goes off on him toward the end, it is for the deception - not for loving his daughter, but for falsely ingratiating himself to the family, basing their entire relationship on a lie. I just don't see any evidence that the ingratiating Raj is any more the "real" Raj than the one who lied to Simran's father to score beer. Indeed they are the same - turning it on when it's convenient, to get him something he wants. At any rate, I stress that these things distracted from the movie less than the volume of discussion suggests - I just can't think too much about it.

Also - to Daddy's Girl too - it might not have been clear enough in my review that I completely understand why this film would be special to someone wired a little differently from me. No, it's not my favorite movie ever - but it's not something I would toss away without a thought either. Note that it got one of my longest reviews!

Finally, to my lengthy paragraph above I'll add a hearty "what Beth said" - she captures very well what I mean in my criticism of Raj, and why I don't think it makes him a bad person (though I personally wouldn't be attracted to him).

[yves]

Hi Carla,
Nice review... I'll let you know when I do mine, because there is a lot to say about DDLJ: this amazing 600 weeks also struck me as a sign: there must be something specially attractive in the movie!

[yves]

Hi Carla,

As promised, the DDLJ "review" is available (Ta da!). I've tried my best to be faithful to my impressions, but you'll tell me whether I might not have been too severe.
(Cos in fact I do love the film!)
Cheers,
Yves

[kalsang]

best movie ever...luv shahrukh and kajol in this film..they r the best..they looked really cute//

[Poonam]

Hi Carla,
I saw this movie after hearing so much about it and absolutely hated so many things about it!
One can watch this movie on two levels: One as pure entertainment, good looking actors, great locales, wonderful songs and excellent acting.
On the other hand I watched it as the parent of a young daughter and was disgusted by the hateful male chauvinistic attitude of the lead characters. The father is primitive and vicious. There is no doubt he loves Simren, but only on his terms. He decides to marry her off to some person X regardless of her feelings (I have seen this happen to a few Indian girls in my life and it is always an ugly scenario).
The boyfriend is also another despicable character! He comes to India to win over the girl and basically has no plan! He seems to be crossing his fingers and hoping for the best. The mother has the most realistic assessment of the situation when she tells him to take the girl and elope. There is nothing throughout the movie which shows that the father's character will soften towards a guy like Raj.
The most galling thing about the whole movie for me was Simren's sheep like personality. Hard to believe this girl grew up in England! Does she have a role to play in her own destiny? Dad says marry Indian guy in Punjab and off she goes. How about getting an education and a job? Did these womenfolk ever stand up for themselves or verbalize their needs?
I would have loved to see an ending where Simren tells both her dad and Raj to get lost, goes back to England, gets a job and finds a man who had some respect for her. But these apparently are not traditional Indian values that Indian movies can show.

I am sorry to be so harsh on this film, especially as it is so popular. But thses so called Indian traditons, which the film makers show so approvingly, cause a great deal of misery and pain in real life. A lot of young Asian girls in England killed themselves in the 70s rather than go through arranged marriages.
Take away all good looking actors, songs and gloss and this is one ugly tale.

[Beth]

Go Poonam! Fantastic comments. You raise all sorts of points I've never been able to form clearly. As a woman raised in the US, what you say resonates with some of the things I find problematic in the movie.